We’re Engaged, Now What?

Without us realising, it’s been 4 months since our engagement day. In other words, It’s been 4 months since I became someone’s fiancée! Whew, how time flies.

In Indonesia, especially within Indonesian culture, it is not that common to have a long engagement period. Usually couples got formally engaged just few months, or even weeks before the wedding day. Well my case is a bit different.

We got engaged without knowing when exactly we are getting married. And that, my friends, have caused some frictions in our life.

First there’s the questions.

The one question that I’ve been asked many, many times now. “When’s the wedding?” And when I said I don’t know (yet), most common responses would be “But why wait?”, “Don’t take too long!”, or other similar responses. Basically we were being challenged because we still haven’t set a date even though we are engaged.

There’s also the pressure.

I’d like to call wedding events in Indonesia a big showbiz, especially since the rise of Instagram and the so-called influencers. Just click on one wedding/bride related IG account and you’d be quickly lost in a swarm of flowers, decorations, and dresses images. They are all pretty, I must say… but on the other hand they gave me pressure!

Of course I understand that sky’s the limit with these things… I mean if you want to follow everything from those Instagram/blog images, you have to be prepared to go all out. Now even though I am certain that I don’t want to go all out for my wedding because I want a simple and small one, still I feel pressured in a way that I’m afraid I won’t be able to get a venue, a make up artist, or even photographer for my wedding because they’ve been booked in advance by those all-out brides!

But then… there’s us.

Despite the questions and the pressure, R and I are enjoying our days as an engaged couple. I mean, we think being engaged to each other is special. It means that we have taken another step in our relationship, which is important given the fact that we are a LDR couple.

So, we are savoring each moments; moments like when my heart felt warm,seeing my engagement photos, or when I feel a bit panic when I realised that I forgot to wear my engagement ring when I go out. Ah, of course there are also moments when we argued over finalising our closing-the-distance plans. I can’t really explain in words, but turns out there’s a difference in the way you argue with your boyfriend and your fiancé! :)))))))

Happily engaged! 🙂

Anyway, that’s my current relationship update after the engagement day. We may not have a wedding date yet, but that’s okay. Even though if worst case we can’t get the venue that we want, we’ll just get married wherever! What’s most important is that little by little, our relationship is progressing and we are closer to our final goal – closing the distance and starting our new phase in life 🙂




45 thoughts on “We’re Engaged, Now What?”

  1. Tetap semangat ya Ta hehe.. Yang penting gimana caranya supaya lo bisa tetep chill while others keep questioning. Seize the day, enjoy your moment 🙂

  2. iya Chris..mau nikahnya kapan n dimana urusan kalian aja…gausa diladenin dengan berbagai macam pertanyaan..yang jalanin kan kalian berdua 🙂

  3. betul fokus saja mba ke kebutuhan apa saja yang perlu dipenuhi berdua….kalau terlau banyak input malah pusing sendiri hahaha…

  4. Haha, the never ending cycle of Indonesian questions 😛 .

    Indeed Chris, what most important is that your and R’s happiness; not what others are thinking and maybe “pressuring” you to do.

  5. Menikmati setiap prosesnya, jadi ada yang diingat2 setelah nikah. Kadang yang menyebalkan pas proses menuju nikah, setelahnya jadi bahan tertawa berdua 😁 kalau ada yang nanya ini dan itu, ambil yg baik2 buat masukan. Yang ga sreg langsung buang ke laut hehe. Good luck Chris!

    1. Ah iya, makasih Den, betul banget yg baik ya kita ambil buat masukan.. yg nggak diemin aja.. hihihi. Btw, aku udah berapa kali mau komen ke blogmu tapi gagal.. hiks. akhirnya jadi silent reader deh Den hehe

  6. Congrats again Christa!!!! Aku malah kebalikan lho… lazimnya couples di sini get engaged trs nikahnya lama — siapin wedding dulu. Sampe ada yg nanya emangnya hamil ya soalnya jarak tunangan sm nikahnya cmn kurang dari setengah tahunan 😂😂😂 terus banyak jg yg gak percaya kita gak buat wedding cuma tandatangan ke civil registry aja. Pressure-nya beneran kena ya. Kaya kesannya org2 yg repot padahal kita nya enjoy2 aja bener gak Ta 🙂

    1. Hahaha sama aja yah Mar, cepet salah, lama salah.. intinya apa2 ditanyain mulu hahahaha… aku tuh banyak juga pressure “cepetan booking nanti ga dapet tempat lhoo”, sampe aku bilang, nikah di halaman rumahku (yg literally cuma muat buat 10 orang) juga gak apa apa lah lama2.. yg penting aku sama R bisa finally be together! hehehe :))))

      Bener banget, yang penting enjoy Mar :)))

      1. Iya aku kalo ditanya2in ma orang kok gak gini kok gak gitu (biasanya pd protes aku gak mau pesta wedding) — aku sll jwb kalo aku excited menikah sm org ini bukannya excited sm pestanya heheheh

  7. For me, to get married is a matter of serious relationship. A very good consideration should be taken before entering it.

    As long as you can enjoy the process of engagement, it’s all right. Just ignore the question ‘when’ and other ‘pressure’ from the outsiders.

    But, if you’re ready to go into the marriage, the sooner, the better, I think.

  8. Pihak ini itu memang boleh berkomentar tapi kita juga punya hak untuk sortir komentar mereka. Nikmati setiap prosesnya saja kak, this is your life after all. Tapi jika boleh sharing, selalu bawa dalam doa juga karena kekuatan doa itu sesuatu banget, seringkali melebihi keinginan kita sendiri hehe.

  9. Pertanyaan kalau hidup di Indonesia mah nggak akan ada habisnya Christa hahahaha

    Kapan married, kapan punya anak, kapan anak kedua, kok anaknya blom bisa ana ini ono unu, kapan anak sekolah, dst dst dst. Emang musti tahan mental hehehee

    Semangat Chris…..

  10. Reading this warmed my heart until I got to the photo with your guys hands! Aw and don’t even get me started on the engagement photos. I think it’s fair for you to get married when you’re happy to and instead of worrying about how the wedding looks, it’s more important that you’re happy and having fun with your fiance. It is all about you two after all. You guys are so inspiring!

  11. Oh wow! I can’t believe the similarities between my engagement and yours! Also long distance and don’t know when our wedding is going to be 😊 we have been engaged longer than 6 months, only last month did we have our engagement shoot (here are the pics if you’d like to see: http://wp.me/p70sjl-57 ) and only this month are we discussing possible dates 😂 so I can totally relate! Wishing you all the best with your marriage ❤️

    1. Hi Carla 🙂 thanks for your comment and I wish u the best for your relationship as well, glad you already discuss possible dates.. means LDR no more soon? 🙂 Good luck!!

  12. Congrats! I’ve been engaged for two years now, being engaged doesn’t mean you’re to marry asap. It’s a promise you’ll devote yourselves to each other. Best wishes 💜

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