On Fairy Tale Weddings

Now that I have started to think about getting married, last weekend I went to a wedding fair in outskirts of Jakarta to browse around and find inspirations.

The fair was huge! It took place in a big hall with over 100 of vendors. They came from different categories too, ranging from venues to hand bouquets (Yes, I found one vendor which specialises on hand bouquets only!)… basically everything that you need for a wedding.

Super pretty table decor

Everything was pretty, in whatever style that you could think off.

But in the case of wedding events in Indonesia, beauty does not come cheap. Everything that was labelled “bridal” in the fair was priced approximately 2-3 times higher than normal price. Take my experience in a designer’s booth for example. His price list for a night gown starts at about 10 million rupiah, but then the price for a bridal night gown starts at 30 million rupiah. When I asked him what caused the price gap, his staff told me that bridal gowns “will be made with utmost care and detail, using the best materials”. Oh.

And btw, have you read this article on Vice Indonesia? Crazy, right? One vendor said that on average, his clients spend more than US$ 70,000 on flowers alone! Who knows one event can use as many flowers (and as expensive!)…

Anyway, I have to say that I once almost fell into this insane wedding culture. To be honest, I grew up dreaming of a fairy tale wedding, the one where I would wear a ball gown and dance with my prince charming (Thanks Disney! :P). But life happened, and I realised that I don’t want that kind of fairy tale anymore. Especially since that kind of fairy tale would require me to spend a ridiculous amount of money.

But everybody’s different.

Judging by how popular this grand wedding culture in Indonesia nowadays, I guess there are still a lot of girls that want to have the perfect “insta-wedding”. And to be able to have the perfect “insta-wedding”, be prepared to plan everything waaaayyy in advance! I spoke to one vendor and casually said “February 2018” when I was asked about my wedding date – to which she replied in almost genuine shock “oh that’s cutting it close!”.

Well, well.

I guess it’s good to plan your big day way in advance, but what about preparing yourself to enter a marriage? In my personal opinion, that’s the thing that one really need to focus on preparing. After all, the wedding is just about one night, while the marriage is supposed to last a lifetime ❀






47 thoughts on “On Fairy Tale Weddings”

  1. I don’t know exactly about wedding culture you always mention in your blog, why the price is so expensive.

    But my wedding was just affordable.

    O yeah..I’m amazed so much by the last sentence of your post above, that’s very πŸ‘πŸ‘

  2. Yeah, I read that article on Vice, but was not surprise by Indonesian appreciation of seemingly grand and grander wedding events. Particularly now with social media hype and so on. Since I was a kid, I’m never a fan of wedding (hmm, maybe that’s why I am reluctant to marriage). Most of the wedding party I attended were pretentious. But I like traditional wedding though, the one with the colorful dresses and rituals with local values. It is fun to learn how each culture perceive marriage πŸ™‚

    1. Same here.. Not a fan of wedding either.. I think so far there are less than 5 wedding events I’ve ever been in, including my ownπŸ˜„ And I had tough negotiation with my Mum as well about how many people to invite.. We ended up with some 500 guests.. Too many for me, standard for her..πŸ˜„ Oh well, it’s more parents’ than the bride/groom’s event after all..

      1. Oiya 500 guests ya. Salah ngartikan. Aku dl undangan 500, thn 2008. Habisnya lbh dikit dr budget Mbak Em. Sampe2 aku pernah di thn 2013-an, nasehatin ke a group of ex students: “Jadi ya, nanti 100 juta gaji pertamamu (akumulasi) itu buat biaya nikah,” lha aku pake standar(ku) di tahun 2008, lol. Most of them blm nikah di tahun 2017 ini. Jd ntahlah kira2 mereka nanti abis brp buat biaya nikah (resepsi).

      2. Well I guess 500 guests is considered normal here.. and agree, it’s more of a parents’ events rather than the couple’s, especially when they’re the ones paying… but what I don’t get is when the couple’s paying but the parents still have a lot of things to say.. hopefully that won’t be my case! πŸ˜‰

    2. I do like traditional wedding too, but nowadays it’s getting more expensive! that’s why I decided that I won’t do any adat procession at all :\ (ujung ujungnya duit.. hahahaha)

  3. Hahaha, I was about to share that article as well Chris when I saw the title of this post. It is indeed a crazy-hot business, possibly driven by the “once in a lifetime” tag as well so people are more “willing” to spend more on stuffs.

  4. iya lah apa2 yang berkaitan sama wedding pasti jadi mahal chris. karena kan aji mumpung vendor2nya. kan orang2 rela keluar duit demi once in a lifetime moment. hehehe.

    have fun on vendor hunting ya!

  5. I’m just wondering how they can afford such a big money for one night only event? I rather have a simple with close friends/family and use the money for travellingπŸ˜› 17 years ago my wedding was pretty simple with only about 50 people attending, but we had a best time, but again…social medias are not so big influenced at that time thoπŸ˜œπŸ‘ŒπŸ»

    1. I guess most are still being funded by the parents… if not, I heard some are taking loans to fund it themselves :s I wish I can have a wedding with only 50 people! But then again I come from a big family so I guess that won’t be possible unless I elope hahahaha :)))))))))

      1. Hahaaa elope is the best ideaπŸ‘ŒπŸ» I suppose if you can afford it and it is what you like for your wedding, then it’s up to you ya. Best of luck for your wedding to be Ta. Where is it gonna be?

  6. I think everywhere they will increase the price if you mention the word wedding! A top tip people have been giving me is to say you need things, such as a cake, for an occasion or a party – not giving away too much detail!

    As for preparing for married life, I think there is nothing to prepare for. Apart from maybe a new name, after the wedding you’ll be the same people with the same lives – nothing will change with one party. πŸ™‚

    1. That’s a good tip! I’m going to try to order a cake without mentioning the wedding bit :)))

      Well what I meant is personally I think I do need to prepare myself to become someone’s wife, to move abroad, to share my life with someone, etc because I’ll be the one moving abroad to close the distance with my LDR fiance πŸ™‚

  7. Couldn’t agree more, kak! People are solo much paying attention and details to the wedding but (maybe) not preparing themselves about marriage life. Trus ntar cere (kejadian di abangku, diceraikan istrinya) 😭

    Reality really hits the dream ya, kalo budget terbatas konsep nikah susah dimacem2in πŸ˜‚

  8. Dulu thn 2009, aku dan M abis sekitar 80 juta utk acara nikahan kami dgn tamu sekitar 500 orang. Pake wedding organizer juga, lokasi Cianjur (kota kecil). Itu udah termasuk semuanya, dan hasil kerja si WO bagus menurutku.. Tapi buatku terasa berat juga ngeluarin segitu buat acara sehari..😬 Apalagi kalo dengan harga zaman sekarang ya..

  9. Taaaaaaa omg… we are doing Feb 2018 juga loh for our Indonesian dinner. Cutting it close! Jd serem hahaha. Tp gak wedding2 amat cmn makan aja coz wedding nya ud basi ud lewat πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

    1. Kalo cuma dinner aja masi bisa kali Mar, asal tempatnya udah di booking, terus baju beli aja disana kali ya? hahaha btw itu aku maksudnya tuh asal ngomong aja Feb 2018.. sebenernya bukan bulan segitu :))))) tapi ampir beberapa vendor aku datengin jawabnya “Wah mepet ya” gitu semua.. aku sih senyum2 aja hahahaha, lagian aku weddingnya bakal kecil2an kok.. πŸ˜€

  10. Semangat yaaaa nyiapin nikahan πŸ™‚ nikahan aku kecil dan murah, kalau butuh referensi yang murah-murah sama trik kawin murah bisa tanya aku HAHAHAHA

    Aku baca juga tuh artikel Vice yang soal biaya nikah, tapi menurut aku bukan cuma pernikahan yang jadi ribet setelah ada IG, semuanya ribet karena segalanya mementingkan kepuasan visual semata buat feed IG :p

    1. Aku juga niatnya kecil dan murah kokkk πŸ˜€ eh kamu nulis ttg nikahan di blog ngga sih? Coba coba aku lihat referensi doonggg siapa tau bisa dapet ide hihihihi πŸ˜€

  11. Wah, ga lama lagi, February 2018! Semoga lancar persiapannya Christa dan diberikan kesabaran mempersiapkan semuanya. Ga sabar baca ceritanya nanti.
    Mau menikah secara besar-besaran maupun yang sederhana sebenarnya balik lagi ke tujuan pasangan yang akan menikah ya. Ga masalah besar2an asal ada dananya dan ga ngutang dan mereka bisa menikmatinya. Karena dari pengalamanku : nikah besar-besaran (Adikku pas nikah ngundang 1500 orang dan digedung dan dilakukan secara besar2an) atau nikah tidak besar2an (Kami ngundang 100 orang dan diadakan di halaman rumah), ada saja yang mengkritisi dan menyinyiri hehe. Tapi terus terang kalau aku pribadi, memang sayang ngeluarin uang banyak untuk acara yang hanya sebentar. Karena kebutuhan setelah acara lebih banyak *ini pemikiran orang pelit dan ngirit haha

    1. Ituu sebenernya gak Feb 2018 sii Den, maksudnya tuh aku asal aja ngejawabin Feb 2018 gitu lhooo.. hehehehehe rancu yah aku nulisnya πŸ˜€

      Amiiin, semoga lancar semuanya, makasih Dennn…. πŸ™‚

      Iya bener semuanya balik lagi ke masing2 pasangan, aku setuju banget sama pendapatmu Den! Akupun nanti pastinya udah kebayang bakal butuh lebih banyak setelah pindahan kan, jadi mending ditabung kesitu hehehe πŸ˜€

  12. Asikkk pas Valentine nih keknya hahah semoga lancar ya Chi! Pokoknya ingat, make up harus mumpuni secara itu yg bakal diingat seumur idup ( read : foto kawinan ) hahahha

    1. Feee itu rancu sih aku nulisnya, maksudnya tuh asal aja ngejawab Feb 2018 hahaha… siappp make up aku udah dapet kok dan semoga mumpuniii :))))))

  13. Agreed, menurutku bridal industry is getting over commercialized in general and more prominent in Indonesia.Ak pribadi lebih suka sama tipe wedding di sini karena lebih personal dan gk se riweh di Indo. But again it’s more to a marriage than a wedding itself. Good luck for the prep !

    1. Ah iya wedding disana lucu ya, banyak yg DIY gitu kalo kata si R πŸ™‚ maunya sih aku mirip2 gitu.. hehehe, thank you yaaah Rin! πŸ™‚

  14. Super setuju, masalahnya di Indonesia itu kan kalo nikah yg nikah bukan cuma si pengantin, tapi keluarganya. Apalagi kalau ada Adat segala terlibat, bisa makin mihil.. Ehh terlebih Gengsi deng..hahhaa.. Yang tadinya 10jt cukup, karena pake gengsi jadi 100jt..hahaha..

    Sukses persiapannya yaa Chris.. Kalau pestanya ga gede kali, dan ada kemauan bebikinan yang kayak di Pinterest gitu DIY lucu juga πŸ˜€

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