If you have been following me on Instagram, you might have seen a project that I have been doing for the past year. Started when I arrive in the US a year ago, I put out a picture every day on Instagram with the hashtag #ChristasFirstYear. Well, picture no.365 is still on the draft because I wanted to take a break from Instagram for a bit (posting each day for a year turns out to be a little bit overwhelming), and I also noticed that I have been feeling quite a lot of emotions leading up to day 365! 

You see, I am the type of person who are so used to having plans, checklists, projects, and all that. Every year I like to reflect on my life’s adventures that year and I would expect to see some accomplishments – travel to new places, career related, relationship related, anything that can give me a sense of progression. Unfortunately, as I look back at the past year, at first I found it hard to see that I am progressing this year. 

It made me sad and affected my mood for a couple days, I even had a small breakdown during a video call with my mother and R. I had this urge of wanting to limit contact with my friends in Indonesia because I felt jealous to see how their life is progressing while I felt that mine is not. Poor R did not know what to do, and I did not know what he could do to make me feel better. It wasn’t until I heard my mother’s words that I really get it. 

Life is not always about plans, checklists, projects, progression, and all that. Sometimes life can put you on hold, letting you navigate through it in your current situation. The situation for me is that I am still waiting for my permanent residency, and the chance to finally settle as a resident here. It’s okay. It takes longer than I expected, but it’s okay. 

Come to think of it again, I am being unfair to myself if I think that my life hasn’t been progressing at all this year. The progress may be different than what I planned and projected. But once I was finally able to see the silver lining of my current situation, I can now see the kind of progress that I’ve been making this year. As a newlywed, I have been progressing to become a better partner for my husband. My mother always said that getting married is a lifetime process of learning and understanding, and I think we are moving in the right direction. As a new immigrant, I am progressing too! At least now I can navigate myself through this city that I’m living in and I can definitely take you around Los Angeles if you decided to visit me 😉 And as for myself in general, this year has taught me that I have more patience and strength that I can ever imagine. 

That, my friends, is how I believe my life is still progressing despite everything that is happening 🙂 Thanks for reading and wishing you happy holidays! It’s getting festive here and I hope it is in your place, too 🙂

26 thoughts on “365/365”

  1. Happy one year anniversary in the West Coast Chris!! 😀

    I agree that life is not only about checklists! Checklists indicate that we know everything that we expect to happen; but sometimes without us realizing it, other things are happening too in our life which are also as great! 😀

  2. Yeayyy, You finally made it, chi. Don’t worry about plams, progress etc…cherish the moment and enjoy the ride.

    Happy one year anniversary living in the US….😍

  3. Sometimes the progress that is more difficult to measure is very personal and we simply forget to track and reward our selves. For me, career ladder and traveling are easier to review (and brag!), but a more profound progress is how I develop as a person. How do I view things now? How do I handle this situation differently now than a year ago? I sometimes feel like I have a stagnant career but grow in a different area, for examples, I am more articulated in a meeting and manage to stay positive under a stressful projects. And once I feel like a triumph for being the happier person of my self on Thursday night in my pajamas without any new stamps in my passport.
    And for you, I think moving and adjusting to a new city is not always easy, so pop that champagne, no need to wait the new year :*

    1. Well said Dit, I focused too much on the things that are easier to be seen, while forgetting about the things that should matter more hehehe. Thank you!! BRB buying cheap but good ones on Trader Joes 😛 Happy Holidays Dit!! :*

  4. You’re progressing too Chris. Moving to another country and adapting to the new place and new life as someone’s wife isn’t easy. Good luck with this. If you want to talk, I’m just a DM away as I had been in your shoes.

  5. Christa, peluk dari sini. Karena aku pernah merasakan hal yang sama ditahun pertama, jadi bisa kasih saran : fokus dengan diri sendiri ga usah lihat teman2 yg lain. Pindah ke tempat baru dan melakukan adaptasi itu proses yang tidak mudah dan sebenarnya itulah pencapaian. Memang tidak gampang, tapi nikmati saja prosesnya. Nanti ada saatnya kamu bisa senyum2 saat melihat apa yg sudah kamu lalukan. Tetap semangat yaaa!!

  6. Christa… aku yang cuma stuck di ibukota yang penuh kepahitan ini aja ngerasain apa yang kamu rasain di paragraf ketiga — tapi bener loh kata Mba Yo, moving and adapting in a new country tuh susah, aku ngebayangin aja belum tentu bisa! Rumput tetangga selalu lebih hijau karena rumput mereka bukan kita yang menyiram dan memupuk, jadi cuekin aja haha.. kalo aku baru bisa beli pupuk kompos belum pupuk yang terbuat dari emas gitu jadi gausah liat2 hidup orang. Semangat ya x

  7. sabar aja ya christa, mgkn skrg prosesnya lebih lama, kalo dulu lebih cepet kayanya, cuma sekitar 7 bulan, saya dulu homesick melulu tp setelah lewat 5 tahun kok malah makin males pulang ke Jakarta, tiap kejakarta stress, makin macet, makin serba mahal, hubungan sama temen jadi aneh, selalu pd minta ditraktir dll.

    1. Iyaa sekarang prosesnya kayaknya emang lebih lama, aku udah kontak, tapi dibilangnya emang ada delay in processing, musti sabar aja hehehe… semoga makin lama makin betah deh 🙂 thanks for sharing yaa…

  8. Semangat Christa! I felt the same way just a few months ago. Moving to a new country and adapting to a new life is difficult, and getting used to & surviving the things that once were new to you is a progress. You’ve got this! 💪🏼

  9. Hi Christa, salam kenal! Tulisan ini ngena banget karena belakangan diriku juga suka merasa kurang fulfilled aja, apa lagi kalau dibandingkan dgn posting temen-temen di facebook dan IG. Memang medsos itu bisa jadi racun banget ya 😣
    Well, if it helps, I think it’s normal that some plans, dreams, and expectations will need to evolve when we make big changes like moving countries or get married! Tetap semangat, ya.

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